At least twice a week, our homeschooling foray heads into opportunity for, what I call, "Project Exploration" time. We explore a topic that the boys have chosen, based on brainstorming sessions and developing questions as they learn. These Explore opportunities have led to creating volcanoes to erupt, Newton color wheel experiments, and even research on the planets in our solar system. Recently, our Project Exploration time encompassing learning about the planets that orbit our Sun, including dwarf planets. Ceres and Eris are as much a part of the solar system as the four Inner Planets (Mercury, Venus, Earth, and Mars) and the four Outer Planets (Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus, and Neptune) to my inquisitive five-year-old son. And this learning is all based on his interests and questions.
But, being truly open to life-long learning and allowing my son to develop his own path in the world means accepting him and some of his sometimes zany ideas for who and what they are. And often these explorations lead down paths that infringe upon cultural and societal norms. Now, I'm not talking about raising a rebel (though it's good to rebel against some things) or an insensitive (the world has too many of those) or someone that tries anything (especially morally or physically harmful choices) for no reason. I am talking about respecting the individual that God created so that God can work on my son's heart the most.
Sometimes, this pops out in basic observation due to modeling. We all model a type of person, with both flaws and sparkling gems. My hope is that as Joseph sorts through the mesh of models he meets on a daily basis, he can learn to discern those worth repeating and those worth rethinking. For example, donating hair. I started donating my hair after the last time I snipped it my senior year in high school. Mother was furious and I became determined to find a better way to use something so basic that God gave me. So, six donations later, I'm still growing my hair for children suffering from hair loss and in memory or honor of women and men that have suffered (or died) from cancer in my life. I've known Russell for almost all of those donations and he finally decided to curtail cultural acceptances and grow his own hair to donate. We didn't expect anything else and we definitely didn't prompt others to do it - we just allowed the conviction to work in our own hearts. But, over the summer, when I was lining Joey and Ezra up for their usual haircuts, Joey refused.
"No!" Joey said. "You can't cut my hair."
"Oh, I'll just trim it up then," I replied.
"No, I don't want you to." And, my five-year-old ran into the house.
When I found him, I asked why he was so scared of the trimmer and scissors. I had given him haircuts for years without this type of reserve.
"I want to donate my hair," he said, with resoluteness in his eyes.
I told him that just because Mommy and Daddy were donating their hair did not mean he had to do it. But, my five-year-old refused to listen. Ezra was quite content to munch crackers while I buzzed and snipped his golden locks; but, months later, Joey still defies sitting in the trimming chair. He has felt a call, upon which I cannot impose.
Joey's conviction to show compassion and love to others is something we should encourage. I wish more people had as much gumption to allow their principles to guide them toward what's right, even in the face of ridicule and nonacceptance. But, it takes courage to do something against the normal flow of societal standards.
So, in this homeschooling journey, I try to take my son seriously and explore his questions even when they are inconvenient. If your child wants to learn a certain language (such as the German Joey wanted to learn), don't steer him toward something more "useful," let him learn the language about which he has an innate interest. If your son wants to learn gymnastics instead of football, let him. If your daughter wants to explore STEM subjects, be supportive of her. American culture has some long-standing stereotypes and biases that need to be confronted. Encourage your child to pursue the interests God is prompting in that precious heart - He knows far better than we do.
